Where is Flat Albert?

Flat Al in Benin Part I: The South

2009-03-01T05:14:00.000-08:00

Half a day and several Toblerone bars later, the tired trio made it to their next destination. Arriving at 2 am, they dazedly found the hotel shuttle, checked in, shuffled to their room, and fell exhausted into bed.

When Al woke up the next morning, he took in the tile floors, the air-conditioning,and the gorgeous view and exclaimed: “This doesn’t look like Africa to me!” True, the lovely Hotel du Lac – named for its location on the Cotonou Lagoon which connects the Bight of Benin to Lake Nakoué – isn’t most people’s idea of 3rd world accommodations, but it was the only hotel with airport shuttle service (getting a taxi late at night is expensive and dangerous). Kate also thought her guests could use some “easing in” to life in a developing country.

View from our hotel room

Wasting no time, Kate started them off on a busy sight-seeing schedule. They had only three days before heading North and there was lots to see! The first day, after a relaxed breakfast of pastries and coffee, was spent visiting Cotonou.

Described unflatteringly in Lonely Planet as “being stuck in a taxi with a chain-smoking speed freak,” walking around Benin’s largest city and commercial capital is a unique experience. Kate’s mom couldn’t get over the vast number of taxi-motos (call zemi-djans) swarming the streets like ants. Though intimidated at first, both Lois and Al quickly adapted to riding on the back of these vespa/motorcycles; good thing, too, since they are the primary form of transportation! In fact, motos are so prevalent that Benin and neighboring Togo are the only two Peace Corps countries in the world where volunteers are allowed to ride them (contingent on wearing a helmet at all times, of course).

While Kate’s mom was distracted by buzzing zemis, Al kept marveling at the women carrying huge piles of goods on top of their heads. Several times they turned back only to find him frantically trying to calculate the weight-balance ratio needed to accomplish this impressive feat. Flat Al would soon become equally perplexed by the packing capacity of bush taxis such as this one:

“Defying gravity! Inconceivable!” Al exclaimed.

By late afternoon, the group was tuckered out from meeting Peace Corps staff, exploring busy markets and attempting near-death street crossings. Fleeing the heat and clamor, they gratefully ducked into their last stop of the day, the air-conditioned Zinsou Museum. Only a few years old, the museum is quickly becoming one of West Africa’s premier galleries for contemporary art. The trio was won over by its friendly staff, progressive hands-on approach to art, and coffee shop (one of the only in Cotonou and Benin!). Unbelievably, museum admissions and tours are free so the experience was made even better knowing that, unlike most tourist stops, this one wasn’t reserved just for the wealthy.

The next morning Al and the girls left the hotel early and were met at the water’s edge by the friendly guide Pascal and his trusty boat. Minutes later they were happily speeding toward Benin’s most popular tourist attraction, the aquatic stilt village of Ganvié where 30,000 locals still carry out their lives in, on, and just inches above Lake Nakoué.

Both being snappy dressers, Al and our guide Pascal hit it off immediately.

Ganvié was founded nearly 300 years ago during the time when the Kings of Dahomey were busy scouring the countryside for smaller and weaker tribes to sell into slavery in exchange for canons and liquor. According to legend, as the slave raids became more frequent King Abodohoué of the peaceful Tofinu people decided it was time to take action. So, doing what we’d all do in a similar situation, he turned himself into an egret and flew off in search of a suitable hiding spot. He finally came upon a series of small, mud islands in the heart of nearby Lake Nakoué and thought CA-CHING. Religious ruling of the time said slave hunters could go anywhere BUT over water in search of their human prizes so if he could just figure out how to build a city in the middle of the lake and transport his people across the water, they’d be in business. Clearly, this would be no easy feat, but the king was no dummy. He turned himself into a crocodile and promptly called upon his reptilian buddies to help with the project. The plan was a success and the Tofinu people have been living there, safe from harm, every since.

Life and laundry in a stilt village

Making friends

Floating Market

That afternoon, Al, Kate, and Lois hopped over to Porto Novo. Built on a marsh and still liberally sprinkled with colonial architecture, Benin’s official capital has a very different feel from the hubbub of Cotonou. Here, Al and Lois got their first glimpse of Peace Corps volunteers in action. Southern volunteers were in the middle of a week-long summer camp for motivated young girls. The gang stopped over to check it out and meet some of Kate’s Peace Corps buddies.

Some participants of Camp GLOW (Girls Leading Our World)

No visit to Benin is complete without a visit to Ouidah. Accordingly, Al and the ladies dedicated the entire next day to seeing the eccentric city known for being the birthplace of Voo-doo and one of the most infamous names in the Atlantic slave trade.

First stop was the Ouidah History Museum, housed on the premises of the last remaining colonial fort. Built by the Portuguese in 1721 as a trade and missionary base, the fort stood watch as millions of Africans marched by on their way to slave ships bound for the Americas. Today, the museum documents with accounts and artifacts how Ouidah came to be the busiest slave port in West Africa.

From the museum we hired moto-guides to take us along the 3.5 km slave route from the city center to the sea. They competently led us through the six stages of the journey from slave market to the waiting ships. Among these stages is the “Tree of Forgetfulness” which was believed to have magical properties that allowed whomever circled it (9 times for men, 7 for women and children) to forget their homes and identities, thereby freeing their souls from the pain of their imminent departure. The final stage is today marked by the “Gate of No Return”, a striking monument which stands meters from the water and commemorates the thousands of slaves who left that beach never to return again.

The importance of understanding this dark chapter in world history was not lost on the three visitors. Kate reflected on how the consequences of this part of Beninese history are still felt today, Al was lost in thought remembering his own experiences of persecution, and Lois dutifully took notes and pictures throughout the visit to use in her new position teaching 8th grade Social Studies (which has a substantial unit on Africa). Though this was to be the least light-hearted part of the trip, they all left glad they had come and hoping to remember the important lessons they had learned.

“Will we ever learn from history’s mistakes or are we doomed to repeat them?”

Al and the “Gate of No Return”

Flat Albert does Morocco

2009-03-01T01:43:00.000-08:00

Continuing his jet-setting lifestyle, Al decided to tag along to Morocco and Benin with Kate and her mom Lois. First up was the historic city of Marrakesh. Literally “Land of God,” the city’s spiritual influence was evident at every turn. Though their hotel was in the modern city, called Gueliz, they spent most of their time in the old fortified city or medina, exploring Morocco’s largest traditional market (souk) and taking in one of the busiest squares in Africa (and the world)-- Djemaa el Fna.

Walking around this bustling square is like taking a trip back to medieval times. Your senses are overwhelmed by a combination of exotic sights, sounds, and smells. Everywhere little groups are formed around performers of every type: musicians, dancers, acrobats, story-tellers, and –Al’s personal favorite- snake charmers.

Ssssssss-ensational

Al, being the perfect travel companion,

graciously takes a photo above Djemaa el Fna

From Marrakesh they took the train up to Morocco’s cultural and spiritual center, the ancient city of Fez. Founded in the 9th century, Fez is home to the oldest university in the western world and its medina- largest in Morocco and home to over 2 million people- is the largest contiguous car-free urban area in the world.

They soon found out walking around a medina can be tiring, especially when combined with frequent darting of high speed donkey carts on narrow lanes!

Al trying to entice Kate to buy some traditional Arab nougat candy:
“It’s as tall as I am and only 9 roubat!”

Al kept pushing for less healthy eating options, but luckily they held out for delicious smoothies, a camel burger, and falafel at a fun little café.

Yum!

Refreshed after their meal, Al spied a chess set in the corner and bullied Kate into playing. Clearly hesitant at first, Kate’s confidence grew as she discovered –all expectations to the contrary—that Flat Al was actually a horrible player! When she claimed his king and victory only minutes later our pal Al was heard mumbling something to himself about sharks and “being taken.”

Chess: Game of Geniuses?

After a little more roaming, they were ready to bid their ancient medina farewell. Making a final stop at a sidewalk café, they drank one last glass of addictive Moroccan mint tea then headed back to the hotel to pack for their next great adventure.

“Mint is known to stimulate the brain, you know.”

Flat Albert does Mexico

2009-02-28T16:39:00.000-08:00

After looking forward for some time to finally meeting the great Mr. Flat Albert, Kate’s family got nervous as their departure date approached and there was still no word! Luckily he showed up just in time to fly to Mexico for cousin Emilie’s wedding. After arriving in Cancun, eagle-eyed Al was the first to spot the sign for the wedding party shuttle:

It was taking a while to gather everyone, so Al suggested visiting the airport’s Welcome Bar.

Nothing says “bienvenido” like an ice-cold margarita.

Next came a 3 hour shuttle to the coast, then another hour boat ride out to their little island paradise. Everyone appreciated the prevalence of golf carts (no cars are allowed on the island), one of which buzzed them through the little town to the beach on the other side. Arriving at their hotel “Casa las Tortugas” the group was delighted by its charm! Al especially took to the red porch hammocks, wasting no time before breaking one in.

Al, getting into the swing of things.

At one particularly festive lunch, their pal Al sampled some local beer.

Al, while he was still upright.

Unfortunately for him and everyone else, our buddy had “uno mas!” too many and was reminded why alcohol was not his drug of choice. While Kate’s beautiful cousin Amanda was stooped over the toilet, holding back Al’s wispy white hair as he put himself at ease, she was heard to grumble: “Know your limits, stupid!”

In fact, Flat Al was still feeling so poorly the next day he missed the main event, which he would have enjoyed greatly since this was by no means a conventional wedding ceremony. Emilie and Rowan included traditions from Christian, Irish, Native American, Jewish, and West African faiths… there was even a huppah!

Fortunately, Al was able to see some pictures of which he highly approved:

Maybe if Mileva had been this attractive we would have made it!

At the goodbye breakfast he wished the happy couple well, then turned and shook his head smiling. Love is one of life’s mysteries for which he never found the formula.

Al returns to Eastern Europe

2008-05-06T08:01:00.000-07:00

Al missed Eastern Europe and asked to return by joining a trip Josh and Alina were taking. At first, they were a little hesitant – what would happen to their romantic trip for just the two of them?

hopes for romantic time?

But upon realizing that they were traveling for 2+ weeks with only a few changes of underwear and not a lot of opportunities for showers, they realized it already wasn't going to be romantic in the traditional sense to start. Al was allowed to join.

They started in Prague, where they got a few days with Mr. Paul DeBell, too! They ate a lot of food, drank a lot of beer (and becherovka), and saw some pretty sights and fun museums.

Prague's castle at night

Some propaganda from the Communism Museum

More propoganda from the Communism Museum

Al admits that although he finds the fanged Matryoshka scary, there's also something a little sexy about it all...

Enjoying the night life in Prague. One of the four in the pictures above was not drunk. See if you can guess who!

Al claimed to enjoy hanging out with other intellectuals, but he thought Kafka was "kind of weird."

Visiting the memorial to the students who killed themselves to protest the occupation.

"One of my idols!" Al exlaimed, of Jara Cimrman, one of the Czech Republic's most beloved citizens. For more info, please see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cimrman

One of Cimrman's most brilliant inventions.

After Prague, the trio went to Vienna, but Al was less pleased with Vienna than other cities he has been in. And by Al, I just might mean Josh and Alina. Note the scarcity of pictures of Vienna. After a quick stopover in Bratislava, the trio arrived in Budapest, where they were reunited with Paul. The group continued on with the excellent food, abundance of beer, and some sights to remember. And, yes, a fascist rally. Although they didn’t know what it was when they first got there.

Al, slightly uncomfortable upon realizing that the rally was primarily for blaming all the country's problems on the Jews and Gypsies.

Kossuth, one of the most famous Hungarian rebellion leaders. Most towns have at least one ter (square) named for him.

The largest synagogue in all of Eastern Europe

A monument to the Jews slaughtered at the Danube river bank by the Nazis in WWII

Budapest at night

A few days down in southern Hungary provided Al with the opportunity to see Paul in the classroom, some small-town living, and yes, some ridiculously angry-looking (yet mechanically-oriented) children.

Paul in the classroom

A very serious Bendi

Bendi, fixing the engine

Josh and Alina had a blast on their vacation and ended up being thrilled that Al joined them. "He’s a light packer and never vetoes your pick for dinner," they were overheard gushing about their travel companion.

Flat Albert's Tour de France

2008-04-12T10:35:00.000-07:00

Flat Albert jumped at the chance of joining the Lenn family on their recent trip to France. He couldn't wait to experience all of the great food, art, and culture. The family was excited that Al was joining them too:
After landing in Paris, Mike familiarized himself with the city
and decided to start with the most famous attraction in Paris, the Eiffel Tower
From the top, a staggering 1,063 feet high, one can see all of Paris, including the Champs-Élysées. This avenue leads into the roundabout from hell at the Arc de Triomphe, where 12 streets feed into the circle
Al then headed over to the cathedral of Notre Dame de Paris. The island where it is located, Île de la Cité, is considered the center of Paris and the point from which all road distances in France are measured.
From the towers of Notre Dame, chimeras peer out over the city. Below, another famous cathedral, the Sacré-Cœur in Montmarte, is visible in the background.From Notre Dame Flat Al wandered over to Sainte-Chapelle to admire its beautiful stained glass
At the Musée Rodin, Albert saw one of his favorite sculptures, The Thinker
Left brain view:

The Kiss

Flat Albert next visited the Arc de Triomphe, and braved gale force winds for the view from the top

In the distance is the Grande Arche, a monument to humanitarian ideals designed to be a 20th century version of the Arc de Triomphe To keep from blowing away, Al tucked himself under Roy's care And after all the sightseeing, Flat Albert rested up for the next busy day.

A Day At The Museums
The next day, Flat Albert couldn't wait to see the great museums of Paris. He started with the celebrated art of the Louvre.
Inside, a crowd with their cameras gathered around quite a celebrity...
The Venus de MiloJust do it: The Winged Victory of Samothrace, or Nike
Art being restored:
Throughout the musuem, artists paint copies of the work
And paintings such as La Grande Odalisque by Ingres have been co-opted into advertisements
Elsewhere in the Louvre, Flat Albert easily slipped through the crowd to pose with the Mona Lisa,
and view da Vinci's other impressive work

Portrait of an Unknown Woman, attributed to da Vinci

The Virgin and Child with Saint Anne

St. John the Baptist

"Can you believe the condition of the roof?"

Works by other artists:
St. Sebastian, just hangin out

"Dude, this really sucks"

The Oath of the Horatii, Jacques-Louis DavidThe Coronation of Joséphine, Jacques-Louis David. Refer to the people at the edge of the photo for perspective of its size
This larger-than-life work was starting to give Flat Al quite the opposite of a Napoleon complex. Luckily, he came across figures a little more his size at the tomb of Napoleon Bonaparte at Invalides later that day.
Flat Albert and the Lenn family then took a break for lunch
Sights like those above were a reoccurring end to Roy's meals.

Re-energized after lunch, Flat Albert was ready for the impressionist masterpieces of the Musée d'Orsay, located in a former railway station
Fittingly, the first painting he saw was Luncheon on the Grass by Manet. The band Beirut used part of the image for the cover of the Lon Gisland EP
Whistler's Mother

The Dance Class, Edgar Degas
Renoir:Claude Monet:
The most impressive (or expressive, if you will) part of the collection, the Van Goghs:

"Such a curious fellow"

With the suggestion of afternoon siestas and comfortable beds, Flat Albert went to rest up for his trip to Lourdes.

A Trip To Lourdes
Next, Flat Al and the family hopped on the high-speed TGV toward the town of Lourdes. Located near the Spanish border at the foot of the Pyrenees, Lourdes is a seven hour train ride south. Al enjoyed the the many sights that whizzed by:
Upon arriving, Flat Al thought the presence of palm trees in an alpine village to almost break the laws of space and time
After such a long train ride, Al and the family relaxed in a brasserie and enjoyed the view of the river and the town
Flat Albert then explored the city on foot
The Château Fort of Lourdes, which has origins dating to Roman times
In 1858, a fourteen year old peasant girl named Bernadette Soubirous claimed that the Virgin Mary appeared to her in a grotto. Since that time Lourdes has become a popular pilgrimage site where visitors come to pray at the sanctuary above the grotto and drink from the spring waters.

Lourdes is a small town of 15,000, though it attracts over 5 million visitors a year and has the second-highest number of hotels in France after Paris. The tourist season lasts from Easter to November, and at other times of the year the town is relatively quiet. So on this night in March, only about four restaurants were open. Flat Al and the gang settled for something familiar:Roy: Hey Flat Al, you know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in France?

Flat Al: They don't call it a Quarter Pounder with Cheese?
Roy: Nah, man, they got the metric system. They don't know what a quarter pounder is.
Flat Al: What do they call it then?
Roy: They call it Royale with Cheese
Flat Al: Royallle with Cheese

Last Tango in Paris
Flat Albert began his last day in France with a visit to Père Lachaise, the largest cemetery in Paris. Located here are the tombs of singer Édith Piaf, composers Bizet and Chopin, writer Marcel Proust, and painters Georges Seurat and Jacques-Louis David. As remembered from the visit to the Louvre, David was Napoleon's court painter. However, when the Bourbons returned to the throne, David was exiled as a revolutionary and not allowed to return even in death, so his tomb contains only his heart. Oscar Wilde is also buried here, and admirers traditionally kiss the monument at his gravesite while wearing lipstick.Of all these notable figures, however, the most visited gravesite (and fifth most popular tourist attraction in Paris) belongs to none other than drunken buffoon Jim Morrison, lead singer of The Doors. The grave has been notoriously vandalized over the years, and the bust in place there since the 10th anniversary of his death was stolen in 1988:Today the grave is cleaned up a bit, but because of the large crowds and chances of vandalism, the cemetery has been forced to hire a full-time security guard at the site. Here you'll notice that someone has graciously left a joint at the foot of the grave:
Flat Albert next ventured over to Montmarte, the surrounding district of Paris high on a hill. Montmarte is known for the Sacré-Cœur Basilica as well for the historic presence of artists, performers, and caberets such as Moulin Rouge and Le Chat Noir. The steps of the Sacré-Cœur are a popular gathering place for tourists, and here Flat Al watched as a blue jean-clad performer serenaded the crowd with Radiohead's 'High and Dry'After all that walking Flat Albert and family were ready for dinner, and for their last night in Paris they returned to their favorite eatery of the trip, a hole-in-the-wall Lebanese restaurantAfter the fantastic meal, Flat Albert still had one sight left to see- the Eiffel Tower at night. Upon exiting the Metro he was impressed with the economy in which Parisians found parking spaces:Al held off from pondering the physics of it all and made it to the bridge just in time to see the Eiffel Tower's brilliant display Vowing to return again, Flat Albert bid adieu to the City of Light.

Al Volunteers for Peace Corps Albania

2008-03-13T01:04:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer:
*The views expressed herein are mine and are not necessarily those of the Peace Corps or the U.S. Government*

---Under Construction, akoma---

After visiting Istanbul for the holidays, Al returned to a quieter life in Albania to start his two month service as a Peace Corps volunteer. Before heading back to work though, he traveled to the mountainous Southeastern part of the country in Erseka to check out some isolated villages. Brrrrrr, its as cold as it looks!

Al marvels at the village's stone streets and white-washed houses.

In the middle of January, Al took another trip to Kruja, a tourist city in the North, to attend a training with all Peace Corps volunteers. Kruja is set in the mountains, has great views of the Adriatic Sea, and was home to Skanderbeg, Albania's national hero.

While visiting Kruja, Al goes to an Albanian folk museum to learn about life back in the day for Albanians. He starts by trying on a costume popullore. Had Al lived in Albania 200 years ago, he would be wearing this-

Before saying goodbye to Kruja and returning to Levan, Fier, Al checks out the sunset over the Adriatic from the Mountians.

Flat and friends have Turkey for Christmas

2008-01-22T11:47:00.001-08:00

After a lot of life in the slow lane in small-town Hungary, Al decided to head further East for an exotic and exciting new place. Early Christmas morning Al and Paul took the first bus from Szentes to Budapest, where snow was providing a White Christmas for all of the merrymakers and a headache for our travelers who feared flight delays. All went well, however, and soon they were in the air headed towards Turkey. By sunset they were walking through Istanbul's historic Sultanahmed district, feeling a bit overwhelmed by the enormity of the city and the impressiveness of its sites. Al and Paul met up with their travel companions, Beth Pecora of Virginia Medical College fame and Jennifer Russell of scenic Fier, Albania. Exploration of the city began immediately:

The Hagia Sofia, or Church of the Holy Wisdom, was the world's largest cathedral from it's construction in the 6th Century until the construction of the Seville Cathedral approximately 1000 years later. It was originally the symbol of Byzantine Roman power and Christianity, then became one of the world's largest mosques after the Turkish conquest, and has been a museum since Atatürk. Al put said best: "That thing is pretty bitching."

What's more, turn around and you see:

The view from the previous picture is impressive, but what's even more impressive is that all you have to do is turn around to get this view. The Blue Mosque, or Sultan Ahmed Camii, was built right across from the Hagia Sofia in 1617, giving the two a very Sharks and Jets appearance, as if they are about to whip out a (huge) tape measure to see who has a bigger dome. Unlike the Hagia Sofia, the Blue Mosque is still a working mosque today. Indeed, its muezzin leads a particularly rousing call to prayer five times each day.

At night, when lit by floodlights, the two dueling houses of worship take on a particularly grandiose quality:

Al poses in front of the Hagia Sofia on his way back to the hostel after a busy day of sightseeing.

The Blue Mosque at twilight. Here you see all six minarets (the towers from which the muezzins' voices call the city to prayer). When Sultan Ahmed constructed this mosque, including 6 minarets was seen as utter hubris as the only other mosque with that many minarets was the Ka'aba mosque in Mecca. In the end the Sultan paid for the construction of a seventh minaret in Mecca.

Al on an evening stroll past the Blue Mosque.

Perhaps the best way to start off in Istanbul is to explore it by water. The Bosphorous and the Golden Horne divide the city, and a lot of Istanbul's best views are from the water. Here Al is on board a small boat and ready to go.

Dolmabahce Palace was built towards the end of the Ottoman Empire to rival the great French and Russian palaces in opulence and fight the perception that the Empire was the "sick man" of Europe. Our intrepid travelers didn't get a chance to explore the palace's ornate interior because they learned that Istanbul's numerous and impressive sites all had steep entry prices and they therefore had to be quite selective about what they saw. Al remarked, "I reinvented humanity's conceptions of space and time, I'm not about to fall for a $25 entrance fee to see gilded ceilings. Istanbul, please."

The Ortaköy Mosque in front of the enormous Bosphorous Bridge that spans between two continents and simply won't fit into one picture.

The Maiden's Tower is a relic from Istanbul's long past. It was originally built back in the days when the city was called Byzantium to control the passage of Persian ships from the Aegean to the Black Sea. Now it's an expensive restaurant.

After returning to land our explorers turned their attention to the interior of the Hagia Sofia. Today it's out of commission as a place of religious worship but it's history as both a Christian and Muslim holy place is on display. The combination of Byzantine Orthodox Christian decor and the enormous signs bearing Arabic prayers highlight the tumultuous history of the Hagia Sofia and the city:

Unfortunately no picture can capture just how lofty and impressive the inside of the Hagia Sofia is, but this one tries pretty hard.

One of the numerous beautiful Byzantine religious mosaics in the Hagia Sofia

Jen and Beth in the Hagia Sofia

Tired of looking up all day in the Hagia Sofia and the Blue Mosque, the travelers explored the city by foot. Here Al has convinced them to pose for a close up in front of the Golden Horne.

Looking across the Golden Horne, ready to cross it, climb yonder hill, and explore the busy and cosmopolitan sections of Istanbul waiting on the other side of the ancient section. The tower at the top of the hill is the Galata tower, which was part of the city walls built around ancient Istanbul, known as Byzantium and then Constantinople.

Istanbul, as is fitting for a city of over eleven million people and two thousand years of history, is a city of enormous diversity. One side of Istanbul is encapsulated by the historical Sultanahmed district where the Hagia Sofia, Blue Mosque, and Topkapi Palace are located. It is almost a theme park of incredible history. There a tourist stands out and the entrepreneurial Turks devote great energy to the sale of rugs, hookahs, and pretty much anything they think the tourists associate with Turkey. Another side of the city, just across the Golden Horne and up a hill, is Taksim. This is the Time's Square of Istanbul, a thoroughly modern place where people rush about in a way befitting a huge metropolis. It's a great break to just stroll this area and get lost within an anonymous crowd, a crowd so diverse that a few white kids and a genius blend right in.

Istiklal Caddesi (Independence Street) is a busy pedestrian street that leads up to bustling Taksim Square. This is the ultimate cosmopolitan street with a Turkish twist. At any given time in the day or night it's packed with all sorts of people. The side streets are just as busy and are full of vibrant markets, cafes, bars, bakeries, restaurants and all sorts of interesting things. When weariness and soar feet tired our travelers they enjoyed many a Turkish coffee and nargile (hookah) in the cafes off Istiklal Caddesi. They also became regulars at a certain bakery with particularly tasty Turkish delicacies.

If you find yourself in Istanbul, tired of the huge historical sites of Sultanahmend and the neon lights of modern Taksim, perhaps delving into of the city's many bazaars is for you. These bazaars are packed with milling tourists, Turks, and salesmen peddling all sorts of things. The Grand Bazaar is certainly the most famous of Istanbul's markets, but our explorers preferred the Egyptian Spice market, where with all of the sites and smells you can convincingly pretend to be walking through a bazaar a thousand years ago preparing to barter with the merchants of the silk road.

The melee in the streets between the Grand Bazaar and the Egyptian Spice market.

Turkish salesmanship is an incredible force. At first one is quite overwhelmed by the pushiness of the Turkish merchants who will literally chase you down to try and make a sale. The trick is not to feel targeted but to go along with it and enjoy it. Once you let go and appreciate the aggressive candor and humor of the salesmen outside of every shop, restaurant, and cafe in Sultanahmed, the whole adventure becomes a lot more fun. Some of the best lines heard by our travelers:

-How can I rip you off today?

-Cafe man: Come in! Come in! Enjoy a delicious Turkish coffee by our fireplace!
Neighboring cafe man: We don't have a fireplace but we'll burn a table!

-Random man outside the Hagia Sofia: Have you seen the Hagia Sofia yet? I am an excellent tour guide, please let me take you there!
-Jen: We saw it today, thanks. We're just going home now.
-Man: I can take you there in my helicopter.

Merchant 1: (Sings) What are you doing? What is your name? Where are you from? Why aren't you stopping? Where are you going?
Paul: I'm going that way. (strides past)
Merchant 2: He was mocking you! Will you stand for this?! (quietly) For five lira I shall kill him for you.

-Hats! Hats! These are the best hats! Don't go any further for hats! You don't want those hats! You want these hats! When you wear them it's like summer in there!

-(On New Years Eve) Come in! It's your last chance to let me help you waste your money in 2007! Come in!

Jen and Beth pose with a particularly charismatic spice vendor in the Egyptian market. This man skillfully sold them massive quantities of cinnamon, safron, tea, and who knows what else. He called himself the "spice boy" and promised to turn them into his spice girls. Al and Paul watched on amused as the girls may or may not have been massively ripped off. Beth remarked "It all happened so fast" and Jen noted "I've never had so much fun being ripped off!"

Jen, Beth, Paul and Al spent the vast majority of their time in Istanbul walking around the vast city and taking in the street scenes and the scenery. A couple of times they decided to give their senses a rest and activate their brains and take in one of the excellent museums. From Istanbul's countless museum choices they selected the Military Museum (in the very building where Atatürk attended military academy) and the Archaeological Museum. Both turned out to be excellent choices, as Istanbul's tactical and archaeological importance are perhaps matched by only a tiny handful of other places in the world. A few cool things:

The world's first written peace treaty, signed in 1283BC between Egyptian pharaoh Ramses II and the King of the Hittites, a powerful empire that dominated what is now modern Turkey.

The Alexander Sarcophagus in the Archeology Museum held one of Alexander the Great's appointed kings and depicts some of Alexander's greatest battles against those uppity Persians.

During the beginning of their trip the adventurers had stayed on the more touristy European side of Istanbul. After a few days they boarded one the ferries that serve as a normal mode of public transport in Istanbul and crossed the Bospherous to the Asian side to explore more off the beaten track areas.

Al and the Bospherous from Asia with Europe in the background. He really wanted a picture of himself and the Sultanahmed peninsula in the same picture but focusing made this impossible, even for the man who split the atom. Below is a zoomed in version and you can see the domes of the Hagia Sofia and the Blue Mosque with Topkapi Palace, former nerve center of the Ottoman empire.

Another jaunt off the beaten track was to the Eyüp Sultan mosque back on the European side, but further inland towards the end of the Golden Horne. This mosque was the first one built by the Ottoman's after their conquest of the city in 1453. It is one of the holiest sites in Islam because it was on this ground that Abu Ayyub, one of Mohammed's closest followers, was killed in battle in an Arabic attempt at taking Constantinople. The mosque includes his tomb where he rests along with many of the Prophet's personal belongings.

Al outside of the Eyüp Sultan mosque.

Inside the mosque, which is a very busy worshiping place today.

Behind the mosque is a huge graveyard taking up an entire hill. Our crew climbed through the spooky yet beautiful graveyard to the top, where vast views of the city and the Golden Horde await.

The Golden Horne and waaaay in the distance you can see Sultanahmed.

Al enjoys a Turkish coffee and a spectacular view of the Golden Horne.

If eight days is barely enough to get an introduction to Istanbul, it certainly isn't anywhere near enough time to really delve into Turkey as a whole. This doesn't mean that our travelers gave up the rest of the country, however. Towards the end of the trip they boarded an all night bus to Ephesus, one of the world's most important archaeological sites situated on Turkey's southwestern coast. Ephesus has a particularly long history and the area has been inhabited since before 6000BC. Since then countless Empires have washed over this land. The nearby Artemis temple is not much to look at today, just a few columns sinking into the mud, but it was once an enormous Hellenistic temple and one of the seven wonders of the world. Right above it stand the ruins of St. John's Basilica, where the saint is apparently buried. John the Baptist spent the end of his life here and there is compelling evidence that it was here that he wrote his gospels. Allegedly he brought with him the Virgin Mary and she spent her last days in a small cottage on a nearby hill, which we were fortunate enough to view. The main draw of this area, however, are the ruins of the Roman city dating back to the first couple centuries AD. At it's peak Ephesus was a city of nearly 500,000 inhabitants, including philosophers and gladiators and all of that cool Roman stuff.

Al in front of the Roman Baths. The baths were right next to the city's gates, so that weary (and filthy) travelers could wash before entering the city proper.

Jen in front of a fallen statue of the Goddess Nike, just doing it.

Al resting for a bit on one of the statues lining ancient Ephesus' main drag.

The Temple of Hadrian, which is still impressive today and must have been really something to behold for your average Roman.

Here Al and Paul bond and contemplate how the communal toilets of the famous Roman pluming, while certainly a feat of civil engineering, permitted very little privacy. It wasn't so bad however, as a genius of Al's largess would have a slave warm up the toilet's marble seat on a cold morning. Paul would have probably been of the seat-warming class.

Al strikes a pose in front of the Celsus Library, Ephesus' most used postcard picture. This was one of the Roman Empire's many public libraries and its ornate details have been somewhat remarkably restored.

Right across the street from the library was a brothel, and legend has it that an underground tunnel connected the two. Our uninspiring tour guide told us that the husbands would tell their wifes they were going to the library to study anatomy and then slip over to the whore house. Somehow it seemed as if he had told the joke before. Here Jen relives a bit of history with a pole dance in the ruins of the brothel. Al commended Jen for her hands on approach to history.

The Roman theater at Ephesus, which had an estimated 44,000 person seating capacity, is believed to have been the largest outdoor theater of the ancient world. What's more, the apostle Paul gave many sermons in this theater during his quest to spread Christianity.

After more history then their brains could handle (well, not including Mr. Einstein of course) the intrepid travelers relaxed in a bar in nearby Seljuk with some new friends from Wyoming (of all places) until taking another all-night bus back to the big city and the modern world. They arrived on the morning of New Years Eve. That day was spent in the markets and bazaars and just enjoying the privilege of strolling by such impressive sites for one last day. The evening was given to a bit of merrymaking for the New Year. Istanbul's New Year's celebrations are apparently quite legendary, though the huge celebrations at Taksim Square were disbursed because of anxiety over terrorism. Our adventurers stayed with their new friends from their extremely friendly hostel in Sultanahmed. As the evening progressed the parties spilled into the streets. Al commented "What ripping good fun!" between swigs of champagne.

Metin, our friendly hostel proprietor, opening the bubbly as the clock struck midnight and 2008 began.

Jen took this picture of Paul and Beth with their new friends during the New Years celebrations. By this time Al was long gone - he knows a lot about astrophysics but perhaps more about partying.

The next day, a bit drowsy, Paul boarded a plane back for icy Hungary (where it was snowing, again) and Jen, with Al in tow, caught a flight back to Albania. Beth set out for some exploration of her own as she would enjoy a few more days in Istanbul before returning to the States and the medical library. All agreed that an unforgettable trip had been had. Tune in next time for Al and Jen's adventures in Albania!

Al's Hungary for Adventure

2008-01-14T12:41:00.000-08:00

After seeing and doing so many great things in America, Al decided it was about time he returned to the Old World for a spell. One par avion sticker later he found himself in Hungary, a humble Central European country renowned for its goulash and its discovery of the Rubik's cube.

It was a busy week for Paul, Al's host in Hungary, as another special guest was also arriving, the lovely Gayle Bowerman of Baltimore, Maryland. The three of them started their exploration of Hungary in Budapest.

Al and the famous Danube River in Budapest. Budapest promotes itself as the "Pearl of the Danube" and indeed the Danube is an important part of Europe. Stretching from Germany all the way to the Black Sea through many major cities, this river was once the longtime border of the Roman Empire and currently flows through or along ten nations.

Gayle and Al pose in front of the lions that guard the Szechenyi Bridge. This bridge was the first permanent bridge across the Danube linking the then separate cities of Buda and Pest, an important step towards the becoming the city it is today. The lions appear not to have tongues, and rumor has it that the architect of the bridge was so mocked for this that his shame drove to to jump from his bridge into the Danube, but not, of course, without first firing off a biting rebuttal to his critics: "Your wife should have a tongue just as my lions have, and woe will be unto you!" Zing!

Al in front of St Steven's Cathedral. Saint Steven ("Istvan") was Hungary's first king who, in 1000AD, turned them from a brutal pagan horde into a respectable Christian Kingdom that would subsequently be overrun by a number of other brutal hordes over the next thousand years. Still, St Steven is a big deal in Hungary and you can see his right hand in a special tomb in this cathedral. It's icky.

After all of the sightseeing this genius decided to sample the celebrated Budapest cafe culture and enjoy a piece of Dobosz torta, a sweet Hungarian specialty.

Remarking "That went straight to my thighs, I feel like such a sow," Al decided to walk of some of that rich cake with a stroll through Margaret Island. Al, Gayle, and Paul agreed that Margaret Island is one of Budapest's best treasures. Just a short walk from the excitement of the city's most bustling centers, this mile-long island in the Danube is quite literally an island of calm amidst the big-city mayhem.

Al with the Gothic revivalist style Hungarian Parliament building behind him. This building is one of the most distinctive trademarks of Budapest and happens to be the third largest Parliament building in the world. Even a genius like Al couldn't figure out why a country of Hungary's modest stature needed such a huge Parliament.

Al in front of the Hungarian Academy of Sciences. Though Hungary is proud of its contributions to the sciences such as the discovery of Vitamin C the invention of lunar radar (what is that?), Al was unimpressed and felt that he would gain more from sampling some more fattening Hungarian food.

Eventually our explorers left the big city and returned to Paul's home in Szentes, a sleep town in the Southeast part of the country. Al and Gayle relaxed at home while Paul was busy enlightening the youth. Then, on Thursday, they all got together with Szentes' other resident American, Taylor, to celebrate Thanksgiving. Taylor was kind enough to put a lot of time and effort into looking up traditional recipes and obtaining all of the ingredients so a real Thanksgiving feast was had.

Al oversees the preparation of our special meal with precise formulas for seasoning, berating Taylor with remarks such as "Unlike space and time, the amount of chicken broth in good stuffing is NOT relative."

Gayle, Al, and Taylor sitting down to a Thanksgiving meal fit for the finest pilgrims.

After the feast we decided to relax with some fine Hungarian wines and spirits. Al, in honor of one of his adopted nation's most important celebrations, probably overindulged a little bit but that's all I'll say. What happens in Hungary stays in Hungary.

Soon Gayle had to return to the States but Al stayed in Szentes for some quiet and relaxation. Below are a few pics of Szentes in the winter, which Al called home for a couple of weeks.

The halcyon Kurca River. Al remarked "Yeah, that's pretty" *yawn*

The city's main square with it's tiny Christmas market.

View from Taylor's apartment

One weekend Al accompanied Paul and Taylor on a little trip up to the North to a city called Eger. Eger is known today for it's wine, Egri Bikaver, which literally means bull's blood. Apparently the castle at Eger was one of the most difficult places in Europe for the Turks to conquer and the Hungarian fighters drank large quantities of the local red wine to keep themselves going. The Turks saw their red beards and thought they were drinking blood, hence the name.

Al outside of Eger castle's walls. In one of the proudest moments of Hungarian military history, a force of 2,000 Hungarians fended off more than 80,000 Turks in 1552, temporarily halting the spread of the Ottoman Empire. The Turks returned with even more forces soon, however, and ravaged the Eger area and the rest of Hungary with a good old raping and pillaging spree and subsequently ruled the country for 150 years.

Al with the city scape of Eger as seen from the ramparts of the castle.

Paul and Al bundled up but still happy to be in Eger.

The cold weather in Eger was uniquely intense but Al, Taylor and Paul kept themselves warm with the ubiquitous spiced hot wine and a hearty meal of spicy paprika stew and traditional stuffed cabbage before returning back to Szentes. Once there, Paul and Al packed up for their next adventure: Turkey! Szia!

HabiFlat Al

2007-09-26T13:19:00.000-07:00

Wanting to put poverty housing on his heart and mind, Flat Al arrived in Americus, Georgia. Home to civil rights era flare-ups, the Pecan Festival, the barbershop where Jimmy Carter gets his hair cut, and Nell. This is his tour of Habitat for Humanity International's Global Village and Discovery Center.It all started with some hypothetical thinking. Al's answer to this question: "It would be lame, and someone should do something about it." Way to think like Millard Fuller, (founder of HFH), Flat Al.Look like the 3rd world yet? Shouldn't. 1 in 6 children in the world's richest countries grows up in a house like this. So what's being done around the world?
"Viva simple, decent and affordable!" Mexico kicks off a tour of houses that are build according to the culture of the region with local materials and homeowner "sweat equity," hours of work that are put in to accompany no- interest mortgage payments for their new homes.
Papua's Got a Brand New House. Here, houses are built on stilts according to local custom. Building this way also helps prevent monsoon rains from wiping out the house.

Next came the Sri Lanka house. Here, Flat Al took a gander at cards that children wrote to Habitat for Humanity thanking the organization for helping rebuild their homes after the tsunami. It was here that Flat Al also established that his body is in fact "Buddhalicious"...
...but he's not Ghana let it go to his head. "I really Haiti poverty housing." Because of the climate, Habitat for Humanity homes in Haiti feature a special type of block that allows air to circulate.
Fresh out of puns, Flat Al takes in the scenery. Consulting with Nell Pittman, Project Coordinator for the Women Build program, Flat Al asserted his love for the ladies and all they do to promote transformational and sustainable development.

Feeling accomplished, Flat Al wipes his brow and reflects on a day advocating on behalf of those in need of decent shelter.

**For more coverage of the Global Village and Discovery Center, check out Stephen Colbert's report for the Daily Show: http://www.onlisareinsradar.com/archives/001593.php

Goodbye SF!

2007-08-27T00:14:00.000-07:00

Today is Albert's last day in the Bay Area. He's seen San Francisco. He's seen Mountain View. He's seen Napa. He's been on the bay several times. What hasn't he seen? Oh yeah, Berkeley!

Today I showed Al the building that I'll be spending the next 5 years of my life: Soda Hall

("Study as hard as you like; I'll still be smarter than this entire building of CS grad students and profs combined." --Al)

Then I showed him the great landmark of Berkeley: The Campanile, a nice clock tower that you can hear chime from my apartment.

And that's about all I know about Berkeley. It's ok. Grad students are notorious for not knowing where anything is on campus. But maybe I'll be able to show you more if you come out here to visit *hint, hint, nudge, nudge*

And with that, Flat Al is off to his next adventure!

Albert Tours Erika's Apartment

2007-08-26T23:56:00.000-07:00

It's almost time for Al to fly off to his next destination. But wait, he never got a tour of Erika's new apartment! An awesome 3 min. walk from the Computer Science building (that's about 3% of the time it takes to get to Google), Erika's apartment sits on a hill on the nice side of Berkeley's campus. Here's the gorgeous view from the balcony (when it's not foggy you can see the Bay Bridge and Golden Gate Bridge):

The apartment as a whole is equally nice, but right now, many of the rooms are slightly messy (boys....), so you'll only get to see some things (basically the dining room and bedroom)
The dining room:

Note the Roomba on the floor. This self propelled vaccuum cleaner is a modern day miracle...although it did try to run Albert down a few times...

And last but not least, my room:

It's the night before my first day as a graduate student, so I'm off to catch some ZZZzzzz...
(As you can see, Albert already got comfy on my bed.)

Al's Last Week at Google

2007-08-24T23:27:00.000-07:00

This week was a sad week for Erika and Albert: It's their last week at Google. Flat Al will miss the fun Authors@Google series (where book authors would come to give a talk) and Presidential Candidate circuit (where all presidential candidates stop and give a talk at Google. We saw Ron Paul talk. Apparently Barrack already came. Sorry, Victoria.). But most of all, Al and Erika will miss all the super cool Googlers they met during the internship. :'(

But it wasn't all tears this week. On Tuesday, Google held it's annual Google Dance!! It was definitely THE BEST event of the summer. There was pool, karaoke, and a dunk tank! Al and Erika scarfed down root beer floats, milkshakes, wine, and then we were off to dance. I can't really describe it, but the music was definitely a gazillion times better than any club or school dance that I've been to. And with the free flowing alcohol, there were fun times to be had. I was wayyyyy past Asian-blushy :)

It was a goood last week.

Jam Packed Week Pt. 2

2007-08-16T23:23:00.000-07:00

Then on Thursday, Flat Al had another treat. Vienna Tang, who he saw last week, came to Google to do a performance. So we all ate BBQ while we listened to lovely music outside.

This week has been great, but the best week has yet to come...

Jam Packed Week

2007-08-15T23:04:00.000-07:00

In the past couple days, super cool things have happened at Google. On Friday Aug 10th, the author of the PhD Comics, Jorge Cham, gave a talk at Google. If you haven't read his comic, check it out: www.phdcomics.com
It's a web comic about graduate students. It's hilarious...in a sad sort of way. Yeah, that's pretty much what my life will be like for the next 5 years...

Then on Monday, Albert was around when Wyclef Jean came to Google. Wyclef sang some songs, did some free-styling, and even challenged one of the Google employees to a push-up contest. Check these links out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FT7azf8zco
http://www.flickr.com/photos/drusolini/sets/72157601426008557/

The next day (Tuesday), Albert attended the VP's Engineering summer picnic. It was awesome. There was more yummy food, a rock climbing wall, caricature artists, henna tattoo artists (Erika got a pretty flower on her shoulder), and an Iron Man maze (it's like a moon bounce/gauntlet that you race someone in). Oh yeah, and there was Human Foosball. No, it's not the same as soccer. You actually get a harness and are stuck to a bar... :) Super cool.

Then on Wednesday, we had the End of the Summer Intern Boat Cruise. We looped around the Bay, passing the Bay Bridge and going under the Golden Gate bridge.

I hung around up top for a while. (Albert feared for his life so he stayed in my pocket book where it wasn't so windy.)

(Me and my Google host, Nate.)
(Me after I stole Nate's hat :)

Soon it got dark, so I went inside the boat and hit the dance floor.

(Dancing with the Senior Vice President of Engineering at Google, Alan Eustace :D He's sooooo cool.)

Vienna Teng and Barry Bonds... And Albert

2007-08-07T23:00:00.000-07:00

Today Albert, Erika, Erika's two roommates Henry and George, and Michael, went to see a free concert in Palo Alto (where Stanford is) given by Vienna Teng. Her music is really good. You should check it out.

(That's her in the far back. She's wayyyy smaller than Albert.)

Coincidently that same day, Erika's host at Google, Nate, went to see the SF Giants vs. San Diego Padres baseball game in the city. If you recall, that's the game that SF player Barry Bonds broke the homerun record. Not only that, Nate was two rows from where the ball landed -- which then proceeded to roll back to his row. Even better, you can see him on almost all clips of the homerun that were aired that night. For a good video, check this out:
www.ithacahasgorges.com . That's him in the red box. Definitely click on the comments and look at some of the videos. You can see his friend getting the beer hit out of her hand and then seeing his other friend getting beer poured on him...Teehee.

Albert's Day at Google

2007-08-03T22:47:00.000-07:00

Although Flat Al has already been to Google, he hasn't had a tour of the campus until now. When Albert got off the Google shuttle, the first thing he saw was rows and rows of bikes.

Because Google has a ton of buildings spread out over the area, they decided to put bikes at each entrance so that employees can just bike on over to other buildings for their meetings...or maybe just for lunch... Google also has "conference bikes" (like tandem bikes but it has 7 seats circularly located around one hub that someone can steer). Best part: It has Wi-fi so you actually can have a conference on it if you want to.

Anyway, I digress. Einstein then ran over to the first building to take a picture with the huge Google sign:

And then looked at the courtyard where employees like to take their lunch:

(Google has 16 cafes in the area - each one has a theme: there's a tapas place, a sushi place, an pure ingredient place (where all ingredients are made on site), a carbon neutral place, a European food place, a smoothie place, etc...all super delicious gourmet food, all free :) You can get all three meals at Google. Erika normally starts the morning with yummy pancakes, french toast brioche with blueberry mascarpone filling, omeletes, or crepes. It's a good thing that Albert's flat, cuz Erika was definitely in danger of gaining the Google 15... :( Even "worse" was the "100-foot rule" where no-one ever has to walk more than 100 feet to get food. But at least the microkitchens are stocked with super healthy food... :)

Erika then lost Albert for a few seconds when he decided to play hide-and-seek in the vegetable garden.

(Can you find him?)

On his explorations, Albert encountered some peculiar flamingoes.

These flamingos have been known to move around over night. Or put on ponchos and sombreros for Cinco de Mayo. They also like to get into formation and attack the dinosaur. What dinosaur, you say? Why, Stan the T-Rex of course!

Stan, put Albert and that flamingo down! Don't worry, he's just playing... Although over the course of a week, I have seen a flamingo start in Stan's jaw and then progress down it's rib cage and into it's stomach...On second thought, maybe Albert should just stay away from Stan...

Albert then took a tour of the laundry rooms, Google gyms, the 2 infinite pools (complete with lifeguard!). The infinite pools are small 10ft x 5ft pools that create a current so that you can swim upstream.

Finally, what day is complete without a trip to the masseuse followed by a game on the beach volleyball courts:

("Look! I'm taller than all these people," says Albert.)

BTW, that's my co-workers playing there. They are super good!

Albert and the Intern Go Game

2007-08-01T21:50:00.000-07:00

Today was a big day for Albert (and Erika). All the Google interns got a break from work to participate in a huge mixer: The Go Game. ( http://www.thegogame.com/ ) For those of you who haven't heard of it, it's a huge scavenger hunt that takes place in San Francisco. Designed as a team building activity, you'd think it'd be boring, but it was totally cool.

Since the game started at 11AM in SF, instead of waking up at 5:50 AM to drive down to Mountain View and drive back up to SF, Albert and I slept in a bit and then took the BART to the City. We arrived at the meeting place a little early, so we took some pictures:

Another pier with a funny old ship. (Contrary to how it looks, the guy in the orange jumpsuit in the background is not a convict doing community service but is actually one of the organizers of the Go Game.

Across the way: the Ghirardelli restaurant (SF is home to the Ghirardelli chocolates)...Yummmm!!

Once everyone arrived, we were randomly put into teams. This was ours:

With over 300 interns, there were about 40 teams of 7 or 8. Each team got a cellphone (to receive our missions/questions/riddles and text our answers) and a camera (to take stills and video with). Once the whistle blew, all the teams scattered to find our next location. Sometimes we had to go to a place and find a person to complete an activity: Ex. We had to find a "spy" and figure out the combination on their suitcase by unscrambling the code from a set of Scrabble letters. Another time we had to find a girl that was crying and find out the name of the guy that injured her (she was a jilted bride and we had to coax the groom's name out of her). Or find a "military" guy and do his boot camp -- basically we had to follow his orders and do retarded jumping jacks down the street, etc. For other missions, we had to solve riddles or answer questions. And for others we had to make skits or take pictures. For one we had to act out a historic event but express it as a dance. My team did "The Dinosaur's Extinction." There were tons of really creative missions that kept us running around the city. Needless to say, Albert only popped his head out of my purse occasionally. After the game ended, we all went back to Google to see everyone else's videos and pictures.

It was a great day, and Albert and I went home at the end of it quite tuckered out.

Albert at Alcatraz Island

2007-07-29T21:08:00.000-07:00

A few days later... It was a sunny Sunday morning when we got up bright and early to take a trip to Alcatraz -- home of the Civil War fortress turned military prison turned high security Federal prison turned Historic Landmark and National Park. Alcatraz Island is most famous for housing nefarious criminals including "Machine Gun" Kelly and Al Capone (who died in prison of syphilis -- I'm not sure why, but that kinda makes me giggle).

This visit involved a ride into SF on the BART (SF's equivalent of the Metro), then a trip on the Muni (the local trains within SF), then a bus to the piers, and finally, a ferry boat to the island (Yay, ferry boats! I love ferry boats, esp. with that Bay Area wind!):

(waiting for the bus to the pier)

(Yay, the Embarcadero!)

We boarded the ferry, and in no time we were getting farther away from the Bay Bridge (the bridge that you cross to get to SF from Berkeley):

And closer to Alcatraz:

While we were on the ferry, Michael also took the time to show Albert his iPhone.

Needless to say, Albert was sufficiently impressed.

Soon enough we arrived at Alcatraz Island.

We were ushered into the forbidding fortress, where we then proceeded to climb the hill to the prison. With our tape players in hand, we proceeded to walk the halls (following the audio tour).
Albert highly recommends taking the audio tour -- if you can stomach the sound effects for the re-enactments: the squish of the knife during the cafeteria fight, the pop of the gun during the attempted escapes.

As we were leaving, Albert got a little snappy with the guard - who then proceeded to throw us in jail :(
(Errmmm...Michael didn't get the memo that we were supposed to be sad...)

Soon enough the guards got bored of us and let us go...Once we were back on the mainland,
we headed over to Boudin's Restaurant for some yummy clam chowder in a sourdough bread
bowl. MmmmMmmm!!! Classic.

Keep with the tradition of Albert trying to take on animals much larger than himself, we have this:

Yup, that's a sharks jaw...
But all is well. I tucked Albert back into the safety of my purse and headed home.

Flat Al Goes to NorCal - First Stop, Google

2007-07-27T20:42:00.000-07:00

Sorry for Albert's long absence from the blogspot. It was an unfortunate combination of him being extremely busy having fun (and being slightly sleep deprived ;) and Erika's laptop being at the repair shop for one whole month...yeah, it was ridiculous - but that's a story for another time... Anyway, the important thing is that now Albert is here. He did the whole SoCal thing; now it's time to see what NorCal is like.

From Old Dominion to Sunny California, Albert made his way to Erika's place in Berkeley. For the past couple weeks, he's been traipsing around the Bay area --seeing Berkeley, San Francisco, Napa Valley, Mountain View, among other places.

On July 27th, Flat Albert woke up bright and early (5:50 AM !!) so that he could catch the shuttle to Google with Erika. It was a 30 min walk from her apartment to the Google shuttle stop and then a 75 min. ride to Mountain View, home of Google's main campus. Yes, it's a long ride, but at least they got to sleep in the comfty reclining leather seats. Albert was surprised to find that there was Wi-fi on the shuttle...but instead of taking advantage of this, he laid back and pondered his theory of relativity (a.k.a. went to sleep).

In the office, Albert sat quietly and looked out the window while Erika did some work. Even he's not allowed to see that Google confidential stuff. But at least he had a great view:

(This picture may look ugly...but it's a picture of one of the many solar panels scattered on the rooftops of the Google buildings and parking lots. I love Google. It's such a green company. Sidenote: A more impressive picture can be found at: http://www.google.com/corporate/solarpanels/home )

Albert didn't have to look out the window for too long however. His first introduction to Google was at it's 2nd Annual Summer Picnic. Google rented out the Amphitheatre next door and had a carnival. They had a circus complete with a ribbon dancer (or whatever they call it. You know, Victoria, it's that thing that Pink did when she opened at the Justin Timberlake concert.),
acrobats and ridiculously muscle-y guys,
jugglers, trapeze artists, and contortionists...This looks impossible.

But it's not all fun and games aimed at kids (although they did have a petting zoo, carnival games, and henna tattoo artists)... they also had ALCOHOL!!! :)

Here's a picture of Albert, me, and my Berkeley CS grad student friend and fellow Google intern, Michael before...

...And after. (Yeah, that's Albert taking some of my Hurricane. It's ok, he's over 21. Also, note, Michael double fisting with the Hurricane and a beer....classy... Also, yeah, I'm Asian blushing a tad...). And the other person is Henry, one of my roommates.

Then we watched some people perform at "Google Idol" -- Google's very own talent show.

After the picnic, Michael, Albert, and I hightailed it out of there, and drove to Oakland to see one of the Berkeley CS professor's play, "Oh My Godmother" -- the modern day, gay guy version of Cinderella set in SF. ...Sorry, no photography allowed. But if you ever get the chance to see it, you should. It was hilarious. Both the prince and the "Cinder-Albert" characters were cute...and I'm reasonably certain that neither one was gay :)

After this action packed day, it was off to bed for Erika and Albert. (Einstein, not Cinder-Albert ;)

A Flat Albert 4th

2007-07-27T14:35:00.000-07:00

Following some unforgettable times in South Carolina, Flat Albert thanked his fronting friends for an amazing weekend and set off for his next adventure- a 4th of July celebration in Fauquier County, VA. Before passing the SC state line, though, Alina wisely suggested that they stop to buy fireworks that are unavailable (i.e. illegal) in Virginia.

Entering the store, Flat Al paid no mind to the 'No Smoking' signs. "I'm a rocket scientist- I think I know what I'm doing," he asserted.

Al looked over and noticed that Alina was deep in thought, mulling over the many options...

and so he decided to help her find the right fireworks. He dismissed getting Nuke Power, expressing dismay over its consequences.

"Nuclear power is soo last century."

Later on, he found just the right ones to fit his image:

With the perfect fireworks in tow, Alina took Al home to spend the next few days getting everything ready. On the big day, the Harway family and Flat Albert treated their guests to a delicious cookout, great hospitality, and scenic views of Delaplane. Gaby was ecstatic when dusk came because she couldn't wait to light the sparklers:

The sparklers were hopefully just a taste of the spectacle to come. As the festivities began, however, Flat Al was a bit skeptical as he waited around:

"For serious? A black hole is more illuminated."

Seconds later, a startled Flat Albert was eating his words:

Some of the fireworks reminded Al of the atomic bomb and the Trinity test:

"I am become death", or: "How I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb. "

Albert knew not to be afraid, though, 'cause none of them can stop the time. Luckily, the rest of the show was just breathtaking...

Marveling at the beauty of the display and what it meant, Albert was swept with a sudden pride for his adopted country and he burst into song:

"And the rockets' red glare..."

"The bombs bursting in air..."

Awestruck by the grand finale, Flat Albert saluted the display, proclaiming,

"Today we celebrate our Indepedence Day!"

Fronterfest 2007

2007-07-21T12:12:00.001-07:00

Flat Albert couldn't wait for his next adventure, to Fronterfest 2007 in Columbia, South Carolina. Organized by host Allison Waller as a weekend of fellowship and revelry, it promised to be the largest known gathering of fronters on the east coast. Before setting off early Friday morning, Al and his fronting friends fueled up with members of Al's family.

Al left the family business of coffee and bagels to pursue darker matter.

Flat Albert hit the road, and a few hours later, made the requisite stop at the monument to roadside kitsch, South of the Border.

Al browsed through the souvenirs and tried on a few hats...

"Llamame Alberto"

and wandered amongst the oversized wildlife...
but soon saw South of the Border for the tourist trap that is was:

Al rescued Roy from death in the jaws of tacky novelties, and the fronters escaped to continue on to Columbia. There Allison and her friends treated the fronters to a wonderful dinner of spring rolls, edamame, and soba noodles with vegetables in peanut sauce. As the fronters enjoyed a dessert of exotic ice cream flavors, Flat Albert hit the lights and decided that it was time to get the party started.

Blast off, it's party time!

The fronters rejoiced. Not only was the life of the party present, but Flat Albert's eye-popping appearance also marked the first time he met many of the fronters.

Flat Albert then took on DJ duties and spun some of his favorite tunes...

and joined in on the dancing:

Al and Paul making a sizzlin' double decker sandwich

Tired after a long night of partying, Al found a warm place to crash:

Let's see...Bon Jovi: rocker mullet, ass-tight jeans, and tank top. Flat Al: crazy hair, plaid pants, and cardigan.

Winner- Flat Albert

The next morning, an excited Flat Al woke up the fronters, eager to start their fun-filled day.The fronters enjoyed a lazy morning lounging and eating cinnamon buns, and introduced Flat Al to the theory "U + Me = Us" by the boy band 2ge+her. Al found it quite profound and resolved to look into it more. Albert stayed in that afternoon to further research this new Grand Unification Theory while the fronters took a tubing trip down the river:

The fronters floated aimlessly for a few hours, but escaped the water just as the sunny skies gave way to a flash thunderstorm. They washed up and spent a night on the town, dining on fusion cuisine (Flat Albert's favorite) of Korean and Tex Mex at the Blue Cactus.

The angsty teenager who took this photo was no Einstein at picture taking.

After dinner Flat Albert welcomed the fronters back and everyone enjoyed a night of singing, laughter, choreographed dancing, and banana phones. The merriment lasted through the night.

Flat Albert and the Lost Jungle

2007-06-25T17:05:00.000-07:00

After Albert's long trip with Ariana, he decided to take Gaby, Marissa, Julie and their friends Colin, Eric, and Becca mini golfing on one of the nicest summer evenings of the year. It all started innocently enough...

However, we soon realized that this was no ordinary golf course, and might not prove very relaxing...

Albert's cool quickly disappeared. He hoped we wouldn't notice how scared he was, but it was hard not to. His fear was quite transparent. It seems it wasn't misplaced...

After the close call with the spider, Albert was even more scared, but we convinced him that things would be safer now that we knew what the dangers were, and Albert was able to get into the spirit of things.

He tried to gain an advantage on the score card by attempting to psych us out by standing in the hole. It didn't work though, because we all got a hole-in-one, except for Albert. He somehow managed to score E=mc^2 on every hole...

There were some more warning signs that we were at no ordinary golfing range, and Julie got really scared. Albert's love for the ladies made him want to reassure her.

This led to some problems, because Albert began to act more confident than he was (he wanted to show Julie that there was some brawn to go with all that brain). The rest of us tried to warn Albert to be careful, but he wouldn't listen to us, insistent on showing Julie that there was no danger. So he took a few chances with a caged beast.

Unfortunately, it got the better of him.

Albert was quite alarmed, but Julie overcame her fear and wrestled Albert away from the deathjaws of the beast (we think he kind of liked being rescued by a strong woman).

With the knowledge that his woman was there to save him, Albert was much more relaxed during the rest of the adventure. In the end, no one did very well in the game, but we all made it out alive, and that was all that mattered.

(Becca, Julie, Marissa, Gaby, Al, Eric, and Colin)

---------

THE LSAT

Just when everything seemed safe....things got REALLY scary, and Albert had to get Gaby ready for the LSATs. He made sure that she had enough sharpened #2 pencils (he wanted her to take a few more, but Marissa had to intercede and assure them both that six pencils were more than enough). He also did the lucky Flat Albert dance to bring Gaby some good luck (she says she thinks it made all the difference in the world). Unfortunately, she couldn't actually take him with her, because she was worried that the proctors would think that Albert was trying to cheat with that airplane of his, or by blowing smoke signals with his pipe...

Gaby survived, though, and afterwards, Albert knew just what she needed. (Alcohol and sugar, in case you were wondering).

Julie thought Albert deserved a little pampering since he had worked so hard to help Gaby with the LSATs.

Albert and Gaby's boyfriend, Eric, met, and they got along really well.

Always the gentleman, Albert entertained Marissa with stories about the many times he almost quit his career in theoretical physics to join the circus. Apparently he has always wanted to be shot out of a canon. I bet Freud would have something to say about that.

P.S. Albert is really thankful to Kate for showing him how to use Picasa to improve these pictures. He thinks they may have been too dark to chronicle his experiences otherwise.

Summer fun in the sun

2007-06-24T15:41:00.000-07:00

After Al's adventure in the dark jungle, he decided to take it easy and catch up with some friends at a party in Gaby's backyard. Things started a little seriously, with Paul and Al discussing the Grand Unification Theory.

It's unclear whether they came to any great conclusions, but we did find out that Roy really adores Al and wants Al to like him so much, that he tried to be a little more like him... Everyone got a little embarrassed, because no one wanted to tell Roy that they could tell his cigarette was made out of chocolate.

The awkwardness soon passed, though, and the fun really started when Gaby and Kate decided to try to get Al drunk.

Al finished his own beer, then tried to have some of Paul and Kate's, too.

Then Kate tried to take advantage of poor Al. To be honest, he didn't mind too much ;)

All that alcohol went straight to Al's head, and he got a little inappropriate, telling Alina a dirty joke that involved the theory of relativity and Marilyn Monroe's underwear.

Everyone was having a great time, but when alcohol starts flowing, things can get a little crazy, and there were a few close calls...

It was almost "Death by Salsa." Al decided he needed to step back and take a little breather.

He really liked Gaby's brand new patio furniture that she had just bought from Target.

The next morning, Roy and Dave enjoyed a lovely breakfast outdoors.

They had hoped that Al would join them for breakfast. Unfortunately, he had a little too much the night before, and slept well past noon. I asked him what his next stop was. He said that he was going to see Nell in Georgia, but said he might make a stop first. Until next time :)

Flat Al's Roadtrip

2007-06-23T15:26:00.000-07:00

After attending Victoria's graduation in Charlottesville, Al packed his bags and headed to the Windy City. There, he waited patiently as I finished my last take-home exam and ignored my pleas for answers("I only know laws about thermodynamics and gravity"), and then he, Brian and I squeezed into my car to begin our roadtrip to Santa Monica.

In Chicago, everyone's hair looks like Al's.

Al was feeling a bit under the weather, so he slept the whole first day of our trip. Turns out he only missed about 500,000 cows, 3 windmills, and a goat. But as luck (er, perhaps destiny) would have it, the next day was a bit more inspiring. Between the cows and dust devils in northern Texas, we stumbled across a modern marvel of corrugated steel: the largest cross in North America. Sweet Jesus.

Al says its beauty is in its subtlety.

From there, we exited Texas as fast as we could. We tried a little too hard according to the state trooper in Amarillo. After spending the night in Santa Fe, we headed on to another American marvel: the Grand Canyon.

One can only imagine how many mothers' backs were broken.

Al was having a little trouble blowing in the wind until Ranger Rick came along.

Al, Brian and I then got back in the car for the last leg of our roadtrip. We arrived in Santa Monica at 2:00 am, about 6 hours before I was to begin my first day of work in a law firm.

A coupla old Jews.

My mother wanted to know where Al got his hair done.

From my office, we then ventured on to Brian's. Al made a new friend, someone he felt he didn't have to talk down or up to.

Little Scalia and Al: Two intellectual giants.

The next day's events were meant only for the girls. Al nonetheless found himself accompanying us because Brian had to work (the glamorous life of lawyers!). We then set out to navigate the mass of L.A. freeways down to Orange County.

Is that a Flat Al in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Famished from a long morning trying on dresses, Al stopped at one of L.A.'s finest establishments for lunch.

Flat: "In Germany, some of my best friends were Hamburgers."

From there, we headed to the beach for some relaxing. June Gloom and Santa Monica's "marine layer" (which might be a euphemism for smog, I'm not sure) prevented us from enjoying the Pacific, but Al had fun anyway.

"In Russia, Photo dispenses you."

Brawn over brains.

After an exhausting week in Santa Monica, Al shoveled the sand out of his shoes and packed his bags and LSAT books for Virginia.

the journey begins!

2007-05-20T22:06:00.000-07:00

Before Flat begins his year traveling around the world, he made his inaugural outing to UVA's graduation (kind of like the game of Life where you go to college before you get to have all your adventures).

Flat spent the early part of the morning in economy class (aka in Victoria's purse), getting smuggled into the ceremony.

But soon he was feeling more adventurous, exploring Mr. Jefferson's columns...

and even posing with two distinguished graduates!

Al watched patiently as those amateur UVA students fumbled their way through lining up for the procession (it took them nearly 90 minutes!)

Finally after hours and hours of waiting in the hot sun, Al made it to the actual degree conferral ceremony, where he received honorary degrees in everything ("psh, like I need them" he remarked).

Where is Flat Albert off to next? Law school?? Med school?? Peace Corps??

it's all relative

2007-05-18T16:56:00.000-07:00

The first post! Unfortunately no pictures yet, Flat Albert is still getting ready for his public debut. Just a few days though until Al premiers to the world...